Chocolates, candy hearts, and cuddly stuffed animals are a fun way to express our love to our children on Valentine’s Day.
But if you deeply love your child and want them to thrive, it is critical to SHOW your children by giving them these 3 gifts of love:
Being fully present (physically, emotionally and mentally)-DEVICES closed, EARS open, EYE contact and willingness to ENGAGE in conversation or play. Toddlers to teens NEED and yes WANT to be with you and they need you to want to be with them. When you carve out time for them you are sending the powerful message that they matter and are worthy of your time and attention! There truly is no greater gift you can give to your child than showing your love with your undivided, distraction-free attention.
Showing Compassion (when all you really want to do is lecture, yell and release your pent up frustration)- When your child’s behavior appears to be at its worst, they need you to be at your best. Showing your child you are able to remain calm, compassionate and in control (of your behavior and emotions) not only provides your child with a sense of security but tells your child, “We are in this together!” We can all get through life’s moments when we have someone who loves us to do it with.
Willingness to Understand, acknowledge and validate your child (does not mean you have to agree) – Far too often, we quickly dismiss what our children are saying, what they believe or what they are feeling because we do not agree or a deeper fear within us has been triggered.
Allowing your child to express their point of view and letting them feel their feelings in a safe emotional environment, tells them you care; that not only do they matter as a person, but that their opinions and feelings matter as well and are important!
When your child, no matter how young or old, feels worthy of your time and attention, feels they have a voice (and are not being judged for that voice) feels important and knows you are in this thing called LIFE together, your child feels loved and miracles happen- The parent/child relationship strengthens, both you and your child thrive individually and together as a family, your child grows in responsibility and in independence AND for the icing on the cake, cooperation soars!!